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Tis the Season [burp] - The Fucking Bluebird of Goddamn Happiness [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Zoethe

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Tis the Season [burp] [Dec. 8th, 2003|04:35 pm]
Zoethe
[Current Mood |hungryhungry]

There aren't many gluttony gods in the great pantheons. Adephagia was worshiped in only one temple in Sicily. Hel, goddess of the Norse underworld (the boring place for people who didn't die in battle), has a knife called Sultur, but there is no Norse deity to celebrate excess appetite. One of Raven's many traits is gluttony, but it's just part of the litany. Even Bacchus/Dionysus would prefer you associated them with lust for drink and sex than for overfeeding. We do not worship what we consider to be our weaknesses. The line between the pleasure of eating and the guilt of it is very narrow.

I contemplated this fact while beholding the office kitchen today. There has been an acceleration of excess that borders on frightening. It began this morning, when the two attorneys who were named partner over the weekend in Cincinnati both had the same great idea - I'll bring in bagels and doughnuts! We ended up with six dozen doughnuts and four dozen bagels. Grateful for some breakfast on a morning when I didn't get any, I had a bagel and got out of the kitchen.

When I went back later for water (that's where the ice machine and water cooler reside), I beheld a chocolate cake with the circumference of a bicycle tire, accompanied by a pumpkin cheesecake of equal proportion and a tin of frosted cookies, gifts on some reporting service. Now, about 70 people work in this office, but even still, this is too much of a good thing.

And it doesn't end there. Now a substantial New York style cheesecake and another box of confections has joined the ensemble. No more than a quarter of anything has been eaten, and a good deal will probably be thrown out.

AND, adorning every staff person's desk are three lovely boxes, red, green, and silver glitter and stars, stacked neatly and tied with a ribbon. Filled with chocolates, a thank you gift from the partners.

It's only December 8.

Everyone is painfully aware of how easy it would be to put on 20 pounds, just snacking on what's being sent here as gifts. Nevermind the home baking, the parties, the goodies from Mom. They are staying away, looking wary and worried about how long their willpower can hold out. But there is the equal sense that it's a crying shame for all the goodies to be thrown away.

I took one nibble of cheesecake from the crumbs on the plate. It was so sweet it made my teeth hurt.

There will be no shrine to Adephagia in my office. I am too Venus of Willendorf for my own good already.
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Comments:
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2003-12-09 03:48 am (UTC)

Re: The parable of the foodstuff...

Against cheesecake, I can stand strong. It's not sweets that defeat me as much as salty. The giant containers of popcorn that will undoubtedly arrive are my downfall.
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[User Picture]From: law_witch
2003-12-08 02:28 pm (UTC)
Intersting how law office are a food magnet this time of year. We too have begun to take on the look of a confectioners nightmare here.

Honestly, what is ANY office supposed to do with a 20 pound tin of varies coated pretzels??

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From: (Anonymous)
2003-12-08 03:45 pm (UTC)
..It's not just the law offices. It's the engineering offices too.

I usually just ignore most of the bounty.

AS (CADD-slave-at-large)
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2003-12-09 03:49 am (UTC)
It's a disease at this time of year.
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[User Picture]From: wolflady26
2003-12-08 02:44 pm (UTC)
We do not worship what we consider to be our weaknesses. The line between the pleasure of eating and the guilt of it is very narrow.

I wonder if the lack of ancient gods of overeating is because they considered it a weakness, or if it was more a question of having less opportunity to overeat. I know, for instance, that Romans considered heavy women very attractive, and that a lot of that had to do with the fact that heavier women were obviously not malnourished, and therefore healthier.

Nowadays, women who are more fit tend to be healthier, leading to an attraction to thinner women.
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2003-12-09 03:51 am (UTC)
I dunno. We often idealize what we cannot have. There was much feasting and celebration, but gluttony seems not to have earend respect, Roman vomitoria aside.
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[User Picture]From: wolflady26
2003-12-09 03:56 am (UTC)
Maybe it was something like gluttony on the part of one person would be actively taking food away from others?
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2003-12-09 03:59 am (UTC)
Could be. Doesn't sound exactly right, though - they're gods, and regularly take whatever they damned well please, after all.
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[User Picture]From: spooke
2003-12-08 02:49 pm (UTC)

Waste not...

Rather than letting them throw it out, you might want to send the rest of it to a homeless shelter - I bet they'd be more than happy to have it. Good deeds in December?
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2003-12-09 03:52 am (UTC)

Re: Waste not...

Kinda tough after it's been cut up. But I shall suggest it for future arrivals.
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[User Picture]From: spooke
2003-12-09 05:13 pm (UTC)

Re: Waste not...

I dunno if people eating out of garbage cans would care about it being cut up... but it's nice of you to try it. :)
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2003-12-09 06:23 pm (UTC)

Re: Waste not...

The people wouldn't care, but there are Health Board Regulations that would keep us from donating.

How's that for ironic?
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[User Picture]From: spooke
2003-12-10 03:31 pm (UTC)

Re: Waste not...

You've got to be kidding me. It's healthier to eat garbage than pre-cut cake?

What happened to us?
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2003-12-10 04:06 pm (UTC)

Re: Waste not...

There's no liability if they eat garbage. That's what's happened to us.
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From: genericrick
2003-12-08 02:51 pm (UTC)
While I can't comment on other societies that possessed one of the "Great Pantheons," so to speak, I may have a bit of related insight on the matter. I read once that one of the reasons gluttony became one of the "Seven Mortal Sins" of the Christian (Mainly catholic, now.) church was the result of the "ancestral" puritan logic; namely, if you stuff yourself silly, you won't be able to work, and "Idle hands are the devil's work." Therefore, anything that could invite laziness was considered sinful.

Perhaps other societies felt a similar way? They probably realized that almost encouraging such an act by making it the domain of a god could inhibit work in the grand scheme of things.

*Shrug*
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2003-12-09 03:52 am (UTC)
An interesting thought. And considering the excess that is asociated with the fall of the Roman empire...
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[User Picture]From: salix_03
2003-12-08 07:11 pm (UTC)
there is a hell of a lot of feasting that goes on within the various pantheons of gods. perhaps there was no god of gluttony as food was scarce and gluttony was seen as the domain of all the gods and rich mortals? and yeah, the whole point of the venus of wilendorf is that she IS big and fat and HEALTHY damn it! being coathanger thin and having to go withot food regularly is potentialy deadly and terrible for breeding. *is hot and grumpy* stupid xmas over here in 100 + degree heat is not condusive to eating at all! *wants cheesecake and cold weather*
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2003-12-09 03:53 am (UTC)
Poor thing! No White Christmas for you!
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[User Picture]From: salix_03
2003-12-09 07:41 pm (UTC)
ive never seen snow. unless defrosting the freezer counts?
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2003-12-10 01:45 am (UTC)
Wow. I've heard about people like you....

;-)
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[User Picture]From: salix_03
2003-12-10 06:24 pm (UTC)
oh thank you very much for making me sound like some kind of freak!! ;D i bet you're one of those weirdos who havent seen a kangaroo huh?!? ;P
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2003-12-10 07:18 pm (UTC)
In the zoo. They don't have snow zoos, do they? So Nyah!

[/silly]
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[User Picture]From: salix_03
2003-12-10 08:12 pm (UTC)
They don't have snow zoos, do they?
they're called freezers! ;P
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2003-12-11 03:56 am (UTC)
Definitely not the same thing. Shave ice comes a little closer.
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[User Picture]From: tygher
2003-12-08 09:58 pm (UTC)
*giggles*

I remember my parents, in the days when they both delivered newspapers for a living (Apparently it is possible to support a family of five on delivering newspapers!), receiving dozens and dozens of cookies, bottles of wine, cakes, breads .. all manner of gifts from their customers. We had too much food to eat .. and yet people never got the idea that cash might be better!
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2003-12-09 03:56 am (UTC)
Too much food. And never substantial food. Money is a vastly superior gift for such people.
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