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Pretending it's not true doesn't help - The Fucking Bluebird of Goddamn Happiness [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Zoethe

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Pretending it's not true doesn't help [Jan. 8th, 2009|08:23 am]
Zoethe
[Current Mood |accomplishedaccomplished]

When the clock said "SOS" I knew is was time to get up.

Of course, the clock actually said 5:05. As in a.m. But I'd been awake for at least 15 minutes and was thinking about the work that needed doing, so it was clear that sleep was no longer on the agenda. Might as well get on it.

Why can't I remember this? Why oh why oh why? My personality wants to be a night person, but really my brain is a morning person. I don' like getting up early, but I'm 1000% more productive when I do. I've plowed through a bunch of work this morning, enough that I finally feel like I'm making progress against the uphill battle of my life.

Evenings are for reading and sewing and movies. For going to bed at a decent hour. Mornings are my working time. I knew that in law school. But it's not a discipline that comes easy to me, not when I don't have a full day of work and then a professor to face down in the evening. With my hours to make of as I will, it's easy to let tasks grind on and distractions get in the way.

I hate hate HATE the idea of setting a 5am alarm again, but it's hard to argue with success. And getting up early is highly successful for me.

I'm my own broken record. Grr.
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: gretchen_marie
2009-01-08 03:01 pm (UTC)
I am finding the EXACT SAME THING is true of me, and does it ever piss me off. I hate getting up early in the morning. I am incredibly productive when I get up early in the morning. I still want to be working until 2am. By 11:30pm I'm dead in the water.

Solidarity, sister!
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2009-01-09 05:29 am (UTC)
And here it is, midnight, after a staggeringly busy day, and I am about comatose. I don't think 5am will be calling to me tomorrow morning.
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[User Picture]From: khiron1416
2009-01-08 03:10 pm (UTC)
don't blame yourself.
It's just your body complaining against the anti-naturalness of starting the day at any time other than 5pm.
Municipalities, being perennially broke, moved society to a daylight schedule to take advantage of the cheap light.
In Oral-history societies, having no need to read things written on paper, lawyers get up at 5pm and go to court around 8 or 9 pm.
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2009-01-09 05:29 am (UTC)
That's just awesome. Bullshit, but awesome. ;-)
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[User Picture]From: wdomburg
2009-01-08 03:29 pm (UTC)
It dawned on me that I had become a morning person some time last year. I'm still trying to come to terms with that. :)
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2009-01-09 05:30 am (UTC)
I clearly suck at it, still being up at 12:30....
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[User Picture]From: wdomburg
2009-01-09 03:15 pm (UTC)
I regularly stay up well past when I should because I stubbornly insist on having adult time, regardless of whether I'm too tired to enjoy it. :)
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[User Picture]From: kisekinotenshi
2009-01-08 03:30 pm (UTC)
I'm the opposite, unfortunately. I was made to be nocturnal, and I'm infinitely more productive at night. I get much more done if I wake up at 4 pm and go until 6 am, but I can't do normal person things (go to the bank, call people at offices, go to the library, etc) if I do that. I feel sick and tired most morning (regardless if I wake up at 6 am or 10 am), and generally don't feel like a human being until afternoon and evening. I always get my best writing done at night, and if I wasn't afraid of waking people up, I'm 90% sure I would get my best vocal work at night as well (right now I make do with afternoons).
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2009-01-09 05:34 am (UTC)
The world is more kindly inclined toward the diurnal, without a doubt.
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[User Picture]From: zenithgryph
2009-01-08 03:41 pm (UTC)
I feel just like you. I LOVE staying up late and relaxing, doing all the comfortable leisure-type things that make you sigh in contentment. Yet, the next morning? Sleeping in till 10a or later makes me feel secretly guilty. My best, most productive energies are somehow channeled in the morning when my mind is still a little too groggy from sleep to object and I can delve into labor without any disturbances from a still drowsy mind.

Yet I hate waking up that early. Even with a good quota of sleep under my belt, the alarm clock goes off and I begin to gamble and cajole my mind for just a few more moments, or calling into work (never an option) or whatever else for just a few more moments.

BTW, used your tea pot again yet? I got a french press for Christmas and I'm just itching for some quality, whole-leaf teas!
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2009-01-09 05:35 am (UTC)
I do like it best when I wake up naturally, even if my brain is screaming, "nonono, this is not a human hour!!!!'

Yes, I have indeed used my teapot since!
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[User Picture]From: uplinktruck
2009-01-08 04:06 pm (UTC)
I was born an owl, I've always bee an owl and I'll probably always be an owl. It think it is on our genes.

To this day, I still feel like a vampire on a day pass from time to time.
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2009-01-09 05:36 am (UTC)
I used to be that way....
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[User Picture]From: scouts_angel
2009-01-08 04:12 pm (UTC)
Are you on facebook? ferrett and i are both on livejournalboat community on there but I haven't seen you? Just wondering... I have a lot of LJ friends added on there just in case...
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2009-01-09 05:36 am (UTC)
I've avoided facebook so far - I really don't need another place to waste time!!!
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[User Picture]From: norda
2009-01-08 05:46 pm (UTC)
You and me both with the AM productivity.

I have to have to have to get back to this.
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[User Picture]From: ccr1138
2009-01-08 06:09 pm (UTC)
And see, I *wish*I could be like you. I am a night owl, and do my best work at about 2:00 in the morning. That would be fine, except I have a kid who needs to be at school by 8:00, and my body wants 9 hours of sleep. Even *if* I go to bed at a decent hour, my brain is in a fog until about 11:00 am. It sucks to be out of sync with the world. Consider yourself lucky, my dear.
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2009-01-10 03:40 pm (UTC)
I wish I could just commit fully, one way or the other. That's all I really want....
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[User Picture]From: midnightsjane
2009-01-09 03:51 am (UTC)
I'd love to be a morning person, but it just ain't gonna happen in this lifetime. I am a nightowl, always have been. I get a second wind round about 10p.m., and it's a real struggle to get out of bed before 10 a.m.
Ah, well, we are slaves to our genes, I guess.
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2009-01-10 03:34 pm (UTC)
It would honestly be easier if I could choose one or the other. My brain works better in the morning, but I hate going to bed early.
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2009-01-10 03:35 pm (UTC)
Good luck!!!
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[User Picture]From: amberite
2009-01-11 01:49 am (UTC)
I sympathize, but from the other way around. My brain usually only functions well enough to write during the night. If I take meds to allow me to wake up in the mornings, work, see people I know and feel better, I get sleepy in the evenings and sleep better but don't write as much.
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2009-01-11 03:43 am (UTC)
Life is a series of tradeoffs.

I hate that. I want everything! ;-)
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[User Picture]From: dhimahi
2009-01-16 03:59 pm (UTC)
Hi G. Are you online? I wanted to send an email or a pvt msg but didn't want to bother you if you are not currently online and I don't want a public post.
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2009-01-16 05:01 pm (UTC)
I'm in and out today. If you send it via the private message, I will get it.
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