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Together, they really do fight crime. When they aren't committing it. - The Fucking Bluebird of Goddamn Happiness [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Zoethe

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Together, they really do fight crime. When they aren't committing it. [Jul. 7th, 2011|07:42 am]
Zoethe
The lovely mariness linked to this today:



I am a fan of the Musketeers, and I have to admit to a certain horrified amusement at this trailer. Here are my impressions, in no particular order:

- I confess that I adore Matthew Macfayden, so that casting doesn't bother me.

- For once the appropriate title of one of her movies won't be "Milla Jovovich wakes up naked and confused." (Thank you catvalente for that one.) But her ass-kicking capabilities are undiminished.

- The Musketeers were ninjas. Who knew?

- Airships? Really? How far back in history are we going to retcon steampunk?

- Orlando Bloom still managed to be a pirate this year.

- Christof Waltz: brilliant casting. Percy Jackson: appalling casting. I doubt they will balance each other out.

- Despite how badly I *know* this will be reviewed, I'll probably still see it.
LinkReply

Comments:
[User Picture]From: roaming
2011-07-07 12:11 pm (UTC)
Matthew Macfayden. . . yum. (Mr. Darcy. Tight crotched pants, muscular thighs, walking through the mist.) Yep, it looks awful, you're right. And I'll probably still see it.
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2011-07-07 01:57 pm (UTC)
Mr. Darcy yumminess indeed. I'm feeling a P&P watching coming on.
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[User Picture]From: mariness
2011-07-07 12:29 pm (UTC)
I still fail to see how you can make a Three Musketeers movie of any kind without casting D'Artagnan properly.

But!

Milady is swan diving from chateaus! I....don't know why, but she's swan diving from chateaus! So that may help me ignore the bad acting of D'Artagnan. May.
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2011-07-07 02:09 pm (UTC)
M'lady is swan diving because she is Milla. It's required.

The D'Artagnan casting is scary, no doubt.
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[User Picture]From: k425
2011-07-07 12:31 pm (UTC)
Love Milla Jovovich, love Matthew Macfadyen, love Orlando Bloom.

Could be a completely crap film, but it's an AAB and I think I may make the effort to see it!
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2011-07-07 02:11 pm (UTC)
Yup. Yupyupyup.
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[User Picture]From: scarfman
2011-07-07 12:35 pm (UTC)

I just reread this. I don't think I recognized a single scene in the trailer.

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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2011-07-07 02:13 pm (UTC)
??? As in not recognizing a scene from the book?
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[User Picture]From: halfmoon_mollie
2011-07-07 01:31 pm (UTC)
I love Orlando Bloom in spite of myself. However, this movie has been made and made and MADE. The last most horrible version I can think of had (shudder!) Keiffer Sutherland in it. And OMG, Leo DiCaprio was in one of them too.

And I don't think *I* recognized a single scene in the trailer,either.

I loved the book. But I confessed, somewhat ashamedly, that I will probably see this.
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From: simulated_knave
2011-07-07 01:43 pm (UTC)
DiCaprio was in The Man in the Iron Mask.

And he was atrocious.
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From: simulated_knave
2011-07-07 01:42 pm (UTC)
I can tell that someone's been playing way, way too much Assassin's Creed 2.
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2011-07-07 02:21 pm (UTC)
LOL! You're absolutely right!
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[User Picture]From: jojomojo
2011-07-07 02:13 pm (UTC)
To be fair air balloons were an 18th century thing, so that's only a century out if you really squint :)
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2011-07-07 02:23 pm (UTC)
Well, there ya go. o_O
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[User Picture]From: roniliquidity
2011-07-07 02:15 pm (UTC)
That looks amazing! Granted I was there when I saw Ray Stevenson with a sword.
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2011-07-07 02:25 pm (UTC)
For certain values of amazing, yes. As long as one doesn't actually compare it to any book by Dumas. ;-)
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[User Picture]From: sapphirescarlet
2011-07-07 06:03 pm (UTC)
Dangit! Bloom as a baddie. I don't know if I"m ready for that. And whoever that guy is that's doing the music these days must be draggin' in the big bucks! From the soundtrack alone I half-expected Depp to swing across the bounding main.

I'd love to see Depp and Waltz in something together. I absolutely ADORE Waltz, and he doesn't get enough opportunity to be funny.
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2011-07-07 06:32 pm (UTC)
The weird thing is that in the books Buckingham and Richelieu are sworn enemies, so I'm not quite sure how they are ending up on the same side.

"Loosely based on characters by Dumas" should be the title, but it's not very catchy.
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[User Picture]From: clodia_risa
2011-07-07 11:33 pm (UTC)
My reactions to most of the trailer: Wait, What?

It doesn't look like it's going to be historically accurate, accurate to the plot of the book, or accurate to the laws of physics. But this trailer has made me want to see this movie. It's going to be fun, isn't it?
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2011-07-08 03:19 am (UTC)
That's my reaction as well: forget everything that you know about the Musketeers and go for it.

Except that the kid playing D'Artagnan looks and sounds dreadful in the role. That's the part that will be painful.
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[User Picture]From: ravenofdreams
2011-07-08 02:18 am (UTC)
I'm going to see that.
I'm going to see that drunk, but I'm going to see that.
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2011-07-08 03:19 am (UTC)
It will make an excellent drinking game movie, I suspect.
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[User Picture]From: call_me_harmony
2011-07-10 08:12 pm (UTC)
Shamefully I think I may actually make this one of the few movies I go to see this year.

I hope Dumas turning over in his grave forgives me.
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2011-07-11 12:53 am (UTC)
Dumas would probably love it. I'm simply amused.
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[User Picture]From: daemonnoire
2011-07-11 03:35 pm (UTC)
I think Milla's character is supposed to be the ninja. A steampunk ninja.

I have the sneaking suspicion that someone wrote a really amazing Pirates verses Ninjas steampunk play, and some studio exec went "That sounds great! Lets throw in a couple of extra plot points here, here, here, aaaaaaaaaaaand..... this whole thing over here. Then we can call it The Three Musketeers!"
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[User Picture]From: zoethe
2011-07-11 03:52 pm (UTC)
That sounds very plausible. I'm still going to have fun with it.
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